In 1972, Yoko Ono and John Lennon (the most culturally aware couple of their generation) released a controversial song, “Woman is the Nigger of the World.” It became an overnight sensation, praised by some and reviled by others.
The lyrics in the first stanza went thusly:
“Woman is the nigger of the world,
Yes she is, think about it
Woman is the nigger of the world
Think about it, do something about it
We make her paint her face and dance
If she won’t be a slave, we say that she don’t love us
If she’s real, we say she’s trying to be a man
While putting her down we pretend that she is above us.”
I was 29 years old when the song came out and for me, the timing was perfect since I had just awakened from the somnolent state the American educational system had put me — like so many others — in. The Black Panther Party was pressing the establishment for change, and I was, at long last, thinking and acting politically. I literally became a new man almost overnight.
The song brought the point home to me in no uncertain terms that blacks and women have a common oppressor, the sexist and racist “angry white male.” This bastard had — and has — his boot firmly on the collective throats of both groups, which is why when a black man is accused of disrespecting women it both saddens and angers me. We should be comrades, not antagonists.
Not to excuse Morgan Freeman’s actions, but since no woman had informed him that his remarks were offensive, he could very well have considered them little more than sexy bon mots that the women enjoyed hearing as much as he enjoyed saying them. At worse, he is simply a dirty old man. But still, in this day and age, that’s no excuse, especially considering the unequal power dynamic between Freeman and the women.
What’s going on in society today is a reeducation process; some males have to reassess and reform the way they think about and interact with females … and this is not going to be an easy task to accomplish for many of them. Some will no doubt struggle and stubbornly resist, insisting they mean no harm. It will be akin to teaching old dogs new tricks. But change they must, or at least make damn sure the woman they direct their off-color comments toward is in on the joke and enjoys risqué remarks. Some actually do, you know.
But women will have to reeducate themselves also; they’re going to have to develop the courage to speak out at the time an incident occurs, careers be damned. We blacks had to do this during the civil rights era and many of us lost our jobs or otherwise hurt our careers, but we had to summon the courage to speak out — that is, if we really wanted the change we were clamoring for. I know, I was among the many that suffered financially for my stance back then, but as the saying goes, “no guts, no glory.” I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.
Additionally, I hope that women don’t make a similar mistake some blacks often make: We sometimes misread a situation and see racism where none actually exists. I think some women are mistaking “a blink for a wink” and are thinking a man is flirting with them when he’s not. We don’t want to create a society where every male/female interaction is suspect and governed by rigid rules — how bland would that be? I pray women don’t embark on a witch hunt, waiting to pounce on any stray slip of the tongue, no matter how innocent or misperceived.
And lastly, unless a man is gay, he’s going to stare — in some cases ogle — when a woman wears a skirt so short you can see what she had for lunch yesterday, or a neckline that plunges down to her navel. It’s simply the nature of the beast. It’s very confusing for us men, when a woman dresses so provocatively and then, in effect, says that it’s not OK to look. Can we be blamed for thinking that these women are seeking attention?
It sometimes seems that some women want to have things both ways: They want to be able to dress like cheap hookers, but then blame men for staring. And then blame us again for “slut shaming” if we dare to make a comment on their skimpy outfits. But if it walks like a duck — you know the rest.
Some dudes are just thoroughly — and honestly — confused.
From CoolCleveland correspondent Mansfield B. Frazier mansfieldfATgmail.com. Frazier’s From Behind The Wall: Commentary on Crime, Punishment, Race and the Underclass by a Prison Inmate is available in hardback. Snag your copy and have it signed by the author at http://NeighborhoodSolutionsInc.