Out With the Old, In With the New
Lots of people feeling stuck these days. Stuck in jobs they don’t like. Stuck in relationships they don’t want. Stuck in lives they no longer recognize.
Typically, when one area of our lives experiences a setback, it begins to impact the others as well. After all, we are all just human beings, carrying all our emotions and experiences with us, wherever we go. Sometimes we can be focused and strong and let go of those things that hold us back. At other times we may need some help to get us over the hurdle and towards something new and meaningful.
To clarify, feeling stuck doesn’t always necessitate leaving a situation entirely. Until we’ve dealt with whatever the issue is, it will continue to haunt us, no matter where we go. This is where perspective comes in. Perspective and hard work. And as we close out another year and look forward to the opportunities of the next one, here are some ways in which to get un-stuck and be ready for new goodness.
Shut Off the Noise. We live in cluttered times. Clutter on TV, clutter on the Internet. Clutter in our culture. So when we’re drowning in career-related quicksand, it’s time to isolate the issue. Make a list: what is it about your job that’s making you miserable? Is it your boss? The actual work? The organization? The salary? The geography? Once you know the actual cause, you can make decisions to either stay on, but making a viable change, such as a department move or asking for a pay raise, or realizing that it’s time to look for something new elsewhere.
Let Go of the Past. One thing I’ve noticed this year is how many clients and friends are working through the mourning of layoffs. Layoffs that took place during the market crash of 2008 and the years following. It’s been half a decade and people are still immobile because of the anger they’re holding onto from that life-altering decision. The resentment you’re still latching onto isn’t impacting whomever gave you your walking papers. It is, however, preventing you from moving forward. So write the letter you’ll never send, meditate, draw. Express your feelings in a safe yet impactful way so that they’re no longer trapped inside you.
Hire a Professional. In certain cases, the feeling of being stuck is much bigger than something we alone can conquer. To be clear, I’m not saying we’re not capable of overcoming it. What I am encouraging is the guided help of a trained professional that can work with you. They know the patterns, they can give you the right tools and they will be there for you. Trusted and reputable therapists, coaches and clergy that your friends or family members can refer are a good start.
Personally, I also see a Body Talk expert that helped me cut through all kinds of past blockage, including ancestral trauma that passed though our DNA (Western medicine is finally catching up to this), energetic shifts within my body and surprising discoveries that have been following me for decades.
No matter who you give your hard-earned money to, make sure they are not simply a yes man to comfort you. Rather, an industry pro that will cut through the sea of B.S., get to the truth and tell you what you don’t necessarily want to hear, because they genuinely want to do the best job possible and that’s to see you succeed.
Tap Into Your A-Listers. If we’ve been living healthy, giving lives, chances are, we have friends and family members that we can tap into for advice. These folks ideally should come from different professional backgrounds and be leaders in their fields. They should also have your best interest at heart without being too emotionally invested in your decisions.
In other words, the only thing that’s in it for them is to see you happy. Not manipulate you to take action that benefits them, at your expense. Be very clear about the difference. Reach out to your A-Listers and give them the permission to get honest with you. Let them surprise you in their wisdom and generosity.
Try Something New. Whether joining a new local coffee shop Meet Up group or taking an improv class or even packing a couple of suitcases and traveling alone for half the year, shake up your comfortable world and allow in the universe that’s currently outside your conscious sphere.
As I was couch surfing, in 5 different cities, for 5 months, in 3 countries and 2 continents, I learned who I was, who I wasn’t and, best of all, interacted with people that I would have never met had I continued to live safely behind my laptop. That it refueled my soul is an understatement. It also showed me what I was made of. And when you know your own heart and mind, and can finally heal from the scars of the past, well, that’s when you’re stuck least.
That right there, that’s where the magic happens.
Alexsandra (Alex) Sukhoy, a globally-networked creative and business professional, is CEO of Creative Cadence LLC. Her Career Coaching skills have resulted in numerous success stories for her clients.
Her new novella, Diary of the Dumped: 30 Days From Break Up to Breakthrough, is now available on Amazon, in paperback and Kindle.
Alex recently completed her new book: The Dating GPS™, with childhood friend and Relationship Coach Anita Myers.
Follow Alex on Twitter: @creativecadence