By Alexsandra Sukhoy
“If you’re concerned with the bees dying, then you should be frantic over what’s happening with fathers.” –Marquette Williams
Looking at television today vs. twenty years ago, you’ll notice two significant trends in the family sitcom: 1. There’s less of them. 2. The fathers have, mostly, devolved into buffoons, more caricatures than characters. True, the comic relief of many historical sitcoms has been at the expense of the dad, but the gradient between delivering the joke and becoming one has been all but eliminated in modern television. Without the presence of Bill Cosby, we’ve gone from the unrealistic Father Knows Best to the abysmal Father Knows Nothing.
Unfortunately this disregard for the father figure has not just permeated our television screens, but, also, American homes. Of course, the landscape of the traditional American family has changed and today the rules are gray, the roles grayer. At a time where one salary no longer cuts it, everyone’s trying to do what they think is best and between high divorce rates, absent parents and the fact that now in America more people live alone than within the construct of any kind of family, the population and value systems have both changed. But, at what cost?
Peter Lawson Jones and Marquette Williams, who are both filmmakers and fathers, have examined this, deeply, closely and with such passion and personal and professional interest that they decided to produce a documentary about it.
Fatherhood 101, which premieres Thu 6/13 at 7PM @ Tower City Cinemas, focuses on fathers from all across this country. Some interviewed names and faces we’ll recognize include Tyrese Gibson and the quintessential ’80s TV Dad, Alan Thicke.
“I instantly wanted Alan Thicke. He wasn’t just a dad. He was the cool dad and had the hot wife,” Marquette shared with me via a phone interview from his L.A. studio. “We did two different types of casting: known actors for the exposure we needed,” as well as lesser known fathers that continue to make a big difference. “We wanted alpha dads and the omegas. New dads and dads with kids going off to college…What’s scary is how many (men) said ‘no.’ Even some people who were my friends, they didn’t know the value.
“Fatherhood, it’s a taboo topic. (But) fatherhood is the only thing that matters in life.”
Marquette, originally from Cleveland, partnered with Peter after a professional experience where, he says, “Peter smoothed out some problems for me that made for good projects. Someone actually helped me.” Peter, a community leader and fatherhood advocate, focusing his energy on helping estranged fathers reconnect with their children and have a more active role as a parent, invited Marquette to the annual Fatherhood Conference (which this year takes place Fri 6/14 @ The Wyndham Playhouse Square Hotel.) “I didn’t even know that existed. I wanted to document that. It’s about the human experience.”
“While flying back, I was thinking about my life. I could have taken some fatherhood classes. If there were boot-camp classes, that would have come in handy. It led me to think about my own kids. It made me think, ‘What kind of father am I? Am I a good father? I immediately thought, ‘How much money do I spend on my kid?’ But that’s not it! That’s not the definition of a successful father.
“‘What does make a successful father?’ I wondered. So Peter then suggested, ‘Why don’t you just shoot the program?'”
The result is a film that encompasses the input of 150 fathers. And, while not all of them made it to the big screen, many of their interviews will be made visible in other forums, including the educational and marketing literature surrounding the film. According to Marquette, who serves as both producer and director, “It’s a living campaign.”
“Fatherhood 101 is a documentary that champions the cause of responsible fatherhood,” shares Peter. “The film follows dads who are participating in programs supported by the Cuyahoga County Fatherhood Initiative or the Ohio Commission on Fatherhood. As a state representative and, later, as a county commissioner, I was privileged to establish both programs.”
The film has also received the attention and support of local organizations. Per Peter, “I would be remiss if I didn’t thank the St. Luke’s Foundation, Ohio University, and many private donors — many of whom responded to our recent Indiegogo campaign — for their generous support.”
With this support, neither producer steers away from the hard facts surrounding the epidemics surrounding absent fathers. There’s no political correctness on the topic; there’s simply what is.
“We are a powerless society,” says Marquette. “The American culture has lots its chutzpah. We have to accept the fallout of our actions. If Martin Luther King knew then that people today would be standing on MLK Blvd. selling drugs, he would have done things differently. By placing the financial and the parenting burden on women, did we really give women liberation?”
And this is the central theme — of this film, of what America watches and who Americans are. Women still don’t get paid what men do, account for a tiny fraction of the boardroom and have been fed the myth that we can do it all, do it well and do it all at once — all the while men still own the financial power. Simultaneously, men have been sent the misguided message that they are neither needed nor wanted, that they are simply a temporary accessory, a means to some undefined end.
Who really wins? And, can one gender be empowered only at the cost of pushing down another? Doesn’t seem very enlightening. Which is the very reason why Peter, who’s also interviewed and featured in the documentary, and Marquette wanted to do this film. They ask the hard questions and encourage a dialog and a message of simultaneous hope and work — for everyone involved in a family, whole, broken or somewhere in between.
According to Marquette, “The film was made with the right intention. If you want change, it starts with fathers. It’s not a good or bad side. It’s the truth.”
The world premiere of Fatherhood 101 takes place in Cleveland at Tower City Cinemas. Showtimes: Thu 6/ 13 at 7PM; Sat 6/15 & Sun 6/16 at 2 and 4pm. Columbus, OH screening: Gateway Film Center, 1550 North High Street in Columbus on Sun 6/16 at 6pm. Call 614.545.2255 for details.
The Fatherhood Conference runs on Fri 6/14 @ The Wyndham Playhouse Square Hotel, 1260 Euclid Avenue, Cleveland, Ohio 44115.
Support Fatherhood 101 via Indiegogo.
[Photos: Fatherhood 101]
Alexsandra Sukhoy, a globally-networked creative and business professional with two decades of corporate leadership experience, is CEO of Creative Cadence LLC. Her career coaching skills have resulted in numerous success stories for her clients. Alexsandra teaches classes within the Media Arts and Journalism Departments at Tri-C and Business Environment at the Monte Ahuja College of Business at CSU.
She just released her third novella, The ’90s: Diary of a Mess. Her five-star rated novellas Chatroom to Bedroom: Chicago and Chatroom to Bedroom: Rochester, New York are now available on iTunes, B&N.com and Amazon.
Alexsandra is currently writing two new books: The Dating GPS™, with childhood friend and Relationship Coach Anita Myers and a memoir called Diary of the Dumped™.
Follow Alexsandra on Twitter: @creativecadence.
Cleveland, OH 44113
Cleveland, OH 44115